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Mach two and cock-a-doodle-do

G. George Ostrom | Hagadone News Network | UPDATED 19 years, 10 months AGO
by G. George Ostrom
| March 31, 2005 10:00 PM

They probably teach physics at FVCC. Maybe I'll sign up because there is something driving me bananas. How come you can dial a telephone in Korea, hear it immediately ring in Montana and start talking like you were in the same room, yet . . . the official speed of sound is much slower than that?

The "speed of sound" is a difficult thing for us average folks to understand because the factors include air density, temperature, and the conveying substance. It says in my encyclopedia, standard sound speed in air at sea level with temperature of 32 degrees F is 1,088 feet per second . . . 760 miles per hour. Right?

In water sound goes a mile in one second but in air a mile takes five seconds. See what I mean? Apparently sound travels up to a satellite and bounces back down to earth half way around the world in a thousandth of a second.

Have you ever read such an exciting column? You may be tempted to say, "Who cares?" Please don't!

We'll hurry to something more exciting, but first you need to know some guys over in Spanaway, Wash., are putting everything they own into a car made from a jet fighter body and they are planning to break the world land speed record of 763 mph and then on up to 800 mph to absolutely break the sound barrier.

Their "car" weighs 13,500 pounds, runs on a 52,000-horsepower jet engine, and burns 160 gallons per minute.

If you want to watch these guys go through the sound barrier, and toward Mach two, they will be in the Black Desert of northern Nevada this fall.

In a related matter, Hank Booth of Great Falls is a world land speed record holder from the Bonneville Salt Flats championship for motorcycles in 2003. He averaged 247 miles per hour over a one mile course.

Last week we discussed dogs developing a human vocabulary and this week there is exciting news regarding the famous female gorilla, Koko, that they reported last September, had developed a thousand word vocabulary in American Sign Language.

Koko lives at the Gorilla Foundation in Woodside, Calif. The president of the Gorilla Foundation is a deeply committed researcher named Francine Patterson who is now facing serious sex discrimination charges for "wrongful discharge" filed by two women who were Koko's former handlers.

I am not making this up. According to syndicated columnist Chuck Shepard, the lawsuit against Francis alleges . . . "she pressured these two women to display their breasts to Koko in order to 'better bond' with her. The lawsuit also states, Patterson herself 'had been bonding with Koko for quite some time and thought Koko needed a little variety'." Go figure!

A 911 call to the Flathead County Sheriff's office at 4:40 Easter morning was from an upset rural resident who said the neighbor's rooster woke them up by loud "cackling." At the media briefing Monday morning we asked the Sheriff exactly what his officers did about that complaint. Dupont said he sent a deputy out there to teach the rooster how to "cock-a-doodle-do."

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ARTICLES BY G. GEORGE OSTROM

April 20, 2005 11 p.m.

Rabbits, worms and schmoos

The Feds have outlawed "chain letters" but they keep popping up in one form on another. Last week Montana's Insurance Commiss-ioner told us the con men are now putting chain letter scams on the Internet.

November 22, 2005 10 p.m.

How old is a bear?

A local troublemaker once asked my son, "How long has your dad been out of work?" The boy replied, "Nobody knows. We can't find his birth certificate."

December 1, 2004 10 p.m.

Sacred sandwiches and words

Lead topic last week was miracles and dealt with what I thought was the latest and wildest one I'd ever heard about, where the lady in Cambodia was cured of serious disease by a cow's lick. Had no more than gotten that column off to the newspapers when there was a new mind-boggling miracle story on the radio.