Options to please every palate - just don't count calories

When it comes to fair food, there's just one rule: the unhealthier, the better. And if it's deep fried or has enough sugar to rot every tooth of every kid at the carnival, it's better still.

The trouble is there are so many options. Want something salty? Tater twists or onion rings might do the trick. To satisfy a sweet tooth, try cotton candy or a caramel apple.

With a plethora of options, it might be wise to bring a strategy along with your appetite.

"We walked the strip," Lakeside resident Julie Patrick said. "You can't just jump on the first thing you see."

Patrick and her mother-in-law, Penny, finally settled on corn dogs and homemade potato chips from the Bigfork, Eastside and Polson Lions' Club booth. Although many vendors offer similar fare, the Lions' sign, "Home of the Hand-Dipped Corn Dog," won the women over.

"Never in my regular life would I ever contemplate eating a corn dog," Patrick said.

"Well, any of this stuff," Penny Patrick added. "You save up, eat 'til you're sick and go home."

They came to the fair specifically for the food. After the main course, they planned on dessert: fry bread for Patrick and a caramel apple or cotton candy for her mother-in-law.

"But of course, we're washing it all down with a diet Pepsi," Patrick said.

Every calorie can be justified, she added, because it's consumed for a noble purpose. As opposed to larger fairs with corporate food vendors, the Northwest Montana Fair has booths operated by local groups.

"So you feel like when you're eating this, you're supporting a cause," Patrick said.

One such group, the Kalispell Jaycees, have sold chicken at the fair for years. Their birds - available only in the half-a-chicken size - are one of the most popular items on the fair menu.

"Someone from New York came to the fair specifically for the chicken," said Tiffany Suhr, chairwoman of the chicken booth. She wouldn't disclose the club's secret recipe.

The booth opened Wednesday and will run through Sunday. In that time, the club will use more than a ton of charcoal, 3,500 pounds of chicken and as many as 2,400 bags of sweet corn.

Each bird weighs between 1 1/2 and 2 pounds before cooking.

"So they're big," Suhr said. "They're not anorexic chickens."

Chicken isn't everyone's favorite, though. Sherri Landon, of Kalispell, prefers the paco taco - a taco made with fry bread instead of a tortilla shell.

"That's all I ever eat," she said. "They're really good. It's the best thing here.

"But I'm not eating them all week," she added quickly.

She held up her taco, which was covered in lettuce, tomato and cheese.

"See, doesn't that look good and unhealthy?" she said.

Those craving something sweet headed for another line. The best thing to eat at fair, according to Kalispell resident Jodi Tombarge, is the funnel cake.

"Yes, definitely," agreed 13-year-old Hannah Wilson, also of Kalispell, who was in line in front of Tombarge. "But the mini donut things are pretty good, too."

Wilson's goal is to try something new every year. Last year it was mini donuts; the year before that, funnel cake.

"This year, I'm going to try the Indian taco," she said.

Whatever the favorite food, one thing is certain: No one's at the fair to watch what they eat, except to watch a huckleberry shake or barbecue beef sandwich disappear.

"I think the whole thing is the unhealthiness of the thing," Jesse Buck, of Kalispell, said. "The grease, that's what tastes good. That's what I look forward to: the greasy burgers.

"I think people splurge during fair."

Reporter Kristi Albertson may be reached at 758-4438 or by e-mail at kalbertson@dailyinterlake.com.