America lost a gem of a man and entertainer when Art Linkletter died May 26 at age 97. He made us laugh and we loved him for that.

Linkletter’s long-running “House Party” television show is best remembered for his “Kids Say the Darndest Things” segment during which he interviewed young children. Their impromptu and honest replies were sometimes outrageous and kept us tuning in.

In his memory, I’m reprinting a column I wrote on Sept. 23, 1987, for the Richland County Leader in Sidney, Mont.

‘Kids say the darndest things...’

It was kid lover Art Linkletter who coined that timeless phrase so many years ago — “kids say the darndest things.” Those words come to mind in countless homes where children are being raised. And they’ve come to my mind quite a few times lately.

Our high-spirited Heather, soon to be 3 years old, has become an explosion of imagination and fantasy, just on the brink of entering that wonderful world of make-believe. And oh, if we could just see what goes on inside that little mind. Frankly, these days we never know what she’ll come up with next.

The other day, on the way into town, the (one-sided) conversation went something like this:

“Mommy, I don’t say naughty words, cuz that’s bad, right?”

“That’s right,” I unconsciously agreed.

“Yeah, cuz you know what happens to people who say naughty words? God and Jesus will get a big ladder and come down from heaven and spank their butts!”

I had to laugh out loud, but she was dead serious.

Then there was the time when she asked why I had to sleep with Daddy every night. “Well, we love each other,” I tried to explain. But love, marriage and sleeping together was a bit much for her comprehension. A few days ago, I got this response: “Mommy, I love you. So why don’t we get married and then you can sleep with me instead of Daddy.”

We’re not sure where she picks up some of the phrases we hear. This summer, whenever she’d jump out of the bathtub, she’d streak from one end of the house to the other, yelling, “I’m a na-a-a-ked woman.”

Or when I’d change the baby’s diaper she’d giggle and announce, “Deanna is a naked woman.”

“Heather, why do you keep saying that,” I disgustedly inquired.

“Well, she is naked, isn’t she?” I couldn’t disagree. “And I’m a girl and Deanna’s a girl and you’re a girl. And you’re a woman, too, so we must be womans too, right?”

I just shook my head; I guess there was some warped logic in there some place.

Just this morning, as she scattered Play-Doh all over the carpet, I demanded: “Heather, why do you always have to make a mess?”

“Oh, Mom, you know I’m a stinker,” she innocently replied. I smiled in spite of myself.

All of the messes are forgotten, all the mischievous deeds seem not so bad when she crawls up on your lap (while you’re trying to eat dinner, of course) and says, “Mommy, you’re so special. I just love you.”

Or last week, as Daddy and I were discussing business and Heather sat nearby coloring. Suddenly she looked up at us and simply stated: “It’s a tough life in this world, isn’t it?”

Heather, sometimes you’re wise far beyond your years.

Features editor Lynnette Hintze may be reached at 758-4421 or by e-mail at lhintze@dailyinterlake.com