Generally, societal changes lead to legal reform. In the case of sex crimes, it's the other way around. Laws against them have been advancing for decades. Yet they remain the most underreported crimes; according to the Bureau of Justice Statistics, 63 to 74 percent of victims still do not report.

Silence enables more crime. We still see this much as we did in the dark ages; until that changes victims will keep hesitating.Rape is a form of torture. It is as much, if not more, psychological as it is physical violence. Already thus weakened, victims tend to perceive they will not be believed, so they retreat instead of trying. Too often they're proven right. Years of volunteering in victim-oriented programs revealed big gaps.

Lately, those gaps have begun to close. The newest Post Falls Police/OASIS sexual assault program on May 20 (for more information, call (208) 773-1080) is the latest example of improved coverage. Expanded POST Academy coursework for new Idaho officers, better coordination of services among police and other agencies, the return of specialized nurses to Kootenai Medical Center's ER, national "Jane Doe" protocols adopted locally to allow some victims to report anonymously - all these show a concerted effort by community officials to seriously address concerns.This is welcome and laudable change; those involved in generating the changes deserve the community's thanks. Coping with rape is tough enough. It can change a lifetime, even an entire family. Victims need as few roadblocks and as much help as soon as possible. Yes, these crimes are difficult to prove. Still, just saying aloud "I was raped" and hearing a timely and authoritative "It was wrong and not your fault" improve the odds of healing.

According to sources in an April Press article, reporting hasn't gone up. There is no clear evidence sex crimes have gone down either here or nationally, according to a Department of Justice-sponsored symposium report released in March. Nor have stereotypes and myths significantly improved. Overall, communities are not engaged in combating the problem to change it. As underreported as are assaults on females, males report even less. Yes, boys are molested, abused and raped.I know; no one wants to talk about this. That's the problem. Society needs to catch up with the law.

It will, even if it's kicking and screaming. I have to smile each time I see the new "Slut Walk" flyers now popping up around town (June 18 in Spokane). Slut Walk is a U.S. and Canadian effort to get women out on the streets, "parading" themselves en masse to combat the myth that clothing or attitude negates the meaning of "no" (making attackers what, robots who can't control their reactions to visual stimuli? Hardly flattering).These crimes are not about sex; they're about control - one taking it from another. Rape is still commonly used in war to control not just one person but entire villages, political and ethnic groups. American women and children are still trafficked and sold here, to other Americans, such as on Craigslist.

Aren't we beyond this yet? This is not someone else's problem; its effects are something every family has likely faced, whether or not they are aware. Ask the women in your family and their answers may surprise you. We must make it so intolerable that it's almost impossible to perpetrate.Shame, not outrage, remains the most common reaction (second to loss) to being sexually assaulted, as a result of societal ignorance. Victims should feel no more ashamed than of being robbed; the shame belongs to the thieves. Until society targets the perpetrators as they do with all other crimes, it will continue.If you or someone you know was assaulted, report it. Whether it was recent or long ago, call the North Idaho Violence Prevention Center and talk it out (208) 664-9303. Join the Slut Walk, male or female, and stamp out stereotype in your tight jeans.

Time to call a spade what it is. Sholeh Patrick is a columnist for the Hagadone News Network, sholehjo@hotmail.com