It was a random comment in the 1996 film 'Jerry Maguire' when Jonathan Lipnicki's character blurted out:

"Do you know the human head weighs 8 pounds?"

It was just another endearing line from Lipnicki that allowed him to steal the show from Tom Cruise, but it got me to thinking.

Wow - we carry some serious baggage above the neck.

My research has concluded that Lipnicki's estimate was a little light, as most of my Internet hits came up with 10-12 pounds for that cranium and its contents.

The variance accounts for the amount of body fat we carry on the carcass.

Try picking up a 10-pound dumbbell sometime. That'll give you an idea why your neck ponders mutiny from time to time.

Granted, the cargo is worth protecting. Most of us used the enclosed gray matter to keep us on the straight and narrow.

But the gray matter itself is a fragile thing. It doesn't take much of an impact to make the brain go sloshing around and cause some damage.

Maybe it's time for our superior technology to determine a better location for the brain, and lighten the load up top at the same time.

As a competitive cyclist, I'm just like everyone else in the peloton when it comes to the 'less-weight-is-better' mantra.

Over the years, cyclists have gone from wearing no head protection, to crude leather helmets to today's carbon fiber 'nut cages.'

Yes, we've managed to become safer with a minimal amount of weight added to the region.

But still - a 10-pound head is a 10-pound head. At the end of a long race, it'll feel like a 40-pound head.

Hmmm... there's gotta be a way...

Well, one idea is we swap out the brain for the lungs. That way our thinker is centrally located, protected by a rib cage, and maybe we can come up with some type of cooling system for the top of our head as they heave to and fro under a heavy workout.

I know - it would look pretty silly as your head bobs back and forth as your lungs gasp for air.

Hmm.... again ....

OK, how about if we reposition the stomach between our ears? Not only should that lower our head weight, but everyone will know when we've been overeating. When you've had too many cannolis, you'll throw down, not up.

Hmmm....

I'm sure I can figure this out eventually. That is, if my gray matter hasn't already sloshed around and suffered some damage.

Jerry Hitchcock is a copy editor for The Press. He can be reached at 664-8176, Ext. 2017, or via email at [email protected]