COEUR d'ALENE — Love and death — two of the most mysterious and uncontrollable forces that humans experience. One brings people close together, the other creates an irrevocable rift that separates loved ones until each one has crossed that final threshold.

"Until death do you part" is a powerful piece of the wedding vows, but for some spouses, even death can't keep them from each other.

In Wednesday's Press, a unique double death notice was published. Irene and Ralph Wells, 99 and 93, respectively, died four days apart. Irene passed at 4:45 a.m. on Jan. 10 and Ralph followed closely behind, passing at 5:45 p.m. Jan. 14.

"He knew he did not want to be here without her," said Ralph and Irene's oldest child, Sharon Steward of Coeur d'Alene. "Everything they did was together."

Steward, 73, gathered with her sister, Robin Gagnon, 70, and niece, Karen Kahler, 50, in her parents' Coeur d'Alene home Thursday to share some memories and start the process of "shoveling out" the house, as her father would say.

"This is my father, way back when," she said, holding up a black-and-white photo of a handsome young sailor. "Talk about a youngster."

She explained that the age difference between her parents was something her mom was lighthearted about.

"She said, 'Don't argue with your elders," Steward recalled. "She said, "He was just a spring chicken.'"

Ralph and Irene met when he was in the Navy. They met at a dance in Bristol, N.H., where he was originally from.

"They used to go dancing quite frequently," Steward said.

The young couple was married Jan. 9, 1942. Ralph, a World War II veteran, retired from the Navy after 20 years. They raised three children and moved from California to North Idaho in 1974.

Ralph was an outdoorsman; he loved to hunt and fish and was right at home in Idaho. Irene was always busy and always cooking up something in the kitchen.

"Dad didn’t like to go to restaurants because Mom cooked better than the restaurants," Steward said. "She was a fabulous cook, loved to bake. Every time we visited it was like a different aroma."

Despite diabetes, a broken bone here and there and other non-life-threatening ailments, the Wellses managed to live long, happy lives and leave behind four generations of family. On Jan. 4, Steward said their health had reached that certain point so she placed them into care at the Hospice House where they shared a room.

"They got to face one another so they could hold hands," Kahler said. "It was awesome."

When Irene's time came, Steward and Gagnon said their dad's early-stage dementia made it hard to tell if he knew what had happened.

"We didn’t really know if he was aware," Steward said. "When she was in her death rattle, he says, 'Your mom must be really tired, she’s snoring,' but I don’t think he really realized."

"Until the day before when he told the nurse, 'Do you know Irene died?’" Gagnon added. "He knew, and that was the day before he passed."

"The old school, they don’t talk about losing anybody, they just kind of hold it right inside," Steward said. "He teared up and then instantly got a hold of it and stopped the tears."

For the first time in 74 years, Ralph was without Irene. But not for long.

"I gave him permission to leave. I said, 'If you want to go to Mom, you can. It’ll be all right,'" Steward said. "We were gone three hours and he passed."

Steward, Gagnon and Kahler all agreed that Irene and Ralph shared a connection, a special bond that had been forged nearly three quarters of a century ago.

"They were together in life, they’re together in death," Steward said. "Everything they did was together. They will be interred together at St Pius."

Roger Argo, who has served as mortician and funeral director at English Funeral Home since 1994, has witnessed a few incidents of spouses dying within a short time of each other. It's what some call "broken heart syndrome," or stress-induced cardiomyopathy, when the husband or wife of a recently deceased spouse seemingly dies of a broken heart. Argo said one case that stood out occurred 10-15 years ago.

"They both died of natural causes within a couple hours of each other," he said. "I think they just depend on each other. Sometimes the spouse is their reason for living or hanging on."

According to www.heart.org, a broken heart can lead to cardiac problems as well as issues with depression, mental health and heart disease. It can happen to healthy people who have experienced emotional stress — death, divorce, rejection. Common symptoms are chest pain and shortness of breath. A part of the heart temporarily enlarges and doesn't properly pump while the rest of the heart continues normal function or with more forceful contractions. The chest pain is caused by a surge of stress hormones and can appear to be a heart attack.

"This could even happen after a good shock (like winning the lottery)," the website reads.

One famous case of a broken heart and lifelong love that defies death is the passing of Johnny and June Carter Cash. They were married more than three decades. June died May 15, 2003, and Johnny died almost four months to the day after his wife. They both died of medical complications.

"It’s not something that we see on a regular basis, but it is something that does happen," said Cindy Reed, R.N., director of Hospice House. "It certainly is a bereavement issue."

A Jan. 9 article in The Guardian examined the science of broken hearts and why elderly couples sometimes don't last long without each other.

"Even without the direct heart damage, the physical and emotional consequences of severe grief can take a serious toll on the body," the article reads. "This may be another reason for the stories we hear, which are invariably about people who have been together for several decades. The longevity of their relationship is invariably cited as evidence of their commitment, but it also means both partners are older. The aged body is a lot more frail and rundown than a youthful one, so the shock of losing a very long-term partner may be more than it can handle."

Reed said it's not uncommon for older people to become seriously ill within a year of their spouse dying.

"Grief is certainly a lot of stress on the system," she said. "Especially when you're elderly, it causes some big issues."

Unity Spiritual Center of North Idaho Rev. Diedre Ashmore has worked extensively with people experiencing death and bereavement. She pointed out that those affected by a loss and possibly broken heart syndrome are sometimes siblings or family members other than the spouse.

"With my father’s siblings, three of them died within nine months of each other — first was my father’s oldest sister, Dorothy, who died April 2009; my father died in June 2009 (he was the middle child); and their youngest sister, Bernice, died December 2009," she said. "They were very close."

Ashmore said the phenomenon of couples and loved ones passing so close together is a mystery but may have to do with a deep spiritual connection.

"I've heard it said that we make 'contracts' with one another with regard to what family we choose, what partner we choose, etc. Whether this is true or not, I do not know for sure," she said. "With regard to couples dying close together — there is also a spiritual connection. Some believe that they make a 'pact' or 'contract' together to die at the same time. Others believe that the person who is left has so much grief that they cannot go on and do not want to live without their long-time partner. Consequently we say they have literally 'died of a broken heart' and have lost the will to live."

So why does this phenomenon happen?

"Maybe God only knows that," Argo said.