A man showed up at a talent agency. “I’m John. I got a talking dog act to show ya, chief. This one’ll knock ‘em dead.”

The agent groans.

“Chief, this is Spot. Spot, how does sandpaper feel?”

“Rough!”

“Spot, what’s on top of a house?”

“Roof!”

“Spot, who’s your favorite baseball player?”

“Ruth!”

The agent threw the man and his dog out in the alley.

The dog picks himself up, helps up the man, dusts him off, and says:

“John, if you would have let me say ‘gritty,’ ‘shingles’ and ‘Felix Hernandez’ like I was going to, he probably wouldn’t have done that.”

- Jim Mowreader

•••

Laughter really is the best medicine, so let’s “medicate” together.

Send your best bad, corny, punny jokes. Keep ’em clean and don’t be mean.

Email your ghastly groaners, with your full name and hometown, to: mdolan@cdapress.com.