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Walk calls attention to suicide prevention

CAROLINE LOBSINGER | Hagadone News Network | UPDATED 6 years, 10 months AGO
by CAROLINE LOBSINGER
I grew up in the Tri-Cities, Wash., and have always loved to write. I attended the University of Washington, where I earned a double major in journalism and political science, with an area of emphasis in history. I am the fifth out of six kids — don't believe any of the stories that my siblings tell. To be able to tell others stories and take photos for a living is a dream come true — and I considered myself blessed to be a community journalist. When I am not working, I enjoy spending time with family and friends, hiking and spending time outdoors, genealogy, reading, and watching the UW Huskies and the Seattle Seahawks. I am a servant to my cat, Frankie, who yes, will eat anything and everything in sight … even wedding cookies. | September 4, 2018 1:00 AM

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(Photo by CAROLINE LOBSINGER) Participants in the 2018 Walk for H.O.P.E. cross the Long Bridge to raise awareness for suicide prevention.

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(Photo by CAROLINE LOBSINGER) Participants in the 2018 Walk for H.O.P.E. take part in the annual event to raise awareness for suicide prevention.

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(Photo by CAROLINE LOBSINGER) Participants in the 2018 Walk for H.O.P.E. cross the Long Bridge to raise awareness for suicide prevention.

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(Photo by CAROLINE LOBSINGER) Participants in the 2018 Walk for H.O.P.E. cross the Long Bridge to raise awareness for suicide prevention.

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(Photo by CAROLINE LOBSINGER) Participants in the 2018 Walk for H.O.P.E. walk along the pathway during Sunday's event to raise awareness for suicide prevention.

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(Photo by CAROLINE LOBSINGER) A message of hope is written on a rock as part of Sunday's 2018 Walk for H.O.P.E. to raise awareness for suicide prevention.

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(Photo by CAROLINE LOBSINGER) A bicyclist taking in the 2018 Walk for H.O.P.E. leaves Dog Beach as she takes part in the annual event to raise awareness for suicide prevention.

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(Photo by CAROLINE LOBSINGER) Participants in the 2018 Walk for H.O.P.E. cross the Long Bridge to raise awareness for suicide prevention.

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(Photo by CAROLINE LOBSINGER) Participants in the 2018 Walk for H.O.P.E. cross the Long Bridge to raise awareness for suicide prevention.

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(Photo by CAROLINE LOBSINGER) Volunteers man the grilling station at a community gathering following the 2018 Walk for H.O.P.E., an event aimed at raising awareness and preventing suicide.

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(Photo by CAROLINE LOBSINGER) Participants in the 2018 Walk for H.O.P.E. get ready to take part in the annual event.

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(Photo by CAROLINE LOBSINGER) Participants in the 2018 Walk for H.O.P.E. cross the Long Bridge to raise awareness for suicide prevention.

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(Photo by CAROLINE LOBSINGER) Two young participants in the Walk for H.O.P.E. get ready to ride their scooters in the annual event.

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(Photo by CAROLINE LOBSINGER) Participants in the 2018 Walk for H.O.P.E. cross the Long Bridge to raise awareness for suicide prevention.

SANDPOINT — Inside each bright blue bracelet that Walk For H.O.P.E. volunteers hand out is a secret message — one capable of saving a life.

On the outside are the words “smile” and “Hold On Pain Ends” — the words behind the group’s name. On the inside, however, is a lifeline for everyone: “Crisis? Text 741-741” — the Suicide Prevention text line.

Hold on pain ends is a message that Jennifer Wyman and a host of volunteers have been spreading for the past three years to call attention to suicide prevention. Each September — Suicide Awareness Month — the group holds a walk across the Long Bridge to spread a message of awareness and hope, that no matter how bad things may seem, there is always tomorrow, there is always someone who cares.

“We started this Walk for H.O.P.E. event three years ago after losing our daughter to suicide … and I love to have as many of us come together and as a community we can walk the bridge and we can remind each other that everybody matters and everybody has their struggles,” Wyman told the hundreds gathered in pale blue shirts as they prepared to walk across the bridge. “You have ups and downs but we can help each other.”

The walk, she added, is a great way to get that message out — that everyone matters and that there is always tomorrow no matter how bad the problems may seem or the struggles we all go through.

“I really believe that the more we can break the silence about suicide and mental illness, addictions and all the things that lead up to suicide, the more inclined someone is to come forward and talk about it and share that they’re struggling and get the help that they need,” she said.

Wyman said she hopes the walk — and its ongoing efforts in Sandpoint schools — gets the message out to those struggling, or to those who have lost someone to suicide, that help is out there.

“So much of the time people won’t get help because they feel like they are going to burden that other person,” she said. “They don’t feel like they want to share their fears, and their struggles because they might burden the other individual … so I look out at the world right now, I want everyone to know that I can handle whatever you need. I can be there for you so just trying to remind people that we can handle it, you can get help, we’re here for you.”

This year would have been Madi’s senior year and that makes it difficult because they won’t get to see her graduate or any of the other high school milestones. They won’t get to see her get married, or have her own children.

“I don’t want that to be anybody else’s story,” Wyman said. “I don’t. I want them to get help, to reach out and have those milestones and those memories in their lives.”

Many people, like her daughter, hide their pain or worry they will burden their loved ones if they talk about it. The opposite is the case — we can’t afford for people to not speak up, to stay quiet.

“We have to break the silence and get outside the box and be open and bold and brave,” Wyman said.

The walk and what it represents has been a source of healing for her family and others, a way to embrace hope and a chance to talk for those who have thought about suicide or survived an attempt. Wyman said she has heard from survivors, their families and friends who have been impacted by suicide.

“Until you start talking about it you don’t realize. You look at it as it only happened to us, it only happened to our family,” she said. “Now we can see that it’s happened to so many families, whether it was their grandparent, or an aunt or uncle, or whether it was a high school friend back when they were in school 25 years ago. Everybody has been impacted by suicide, one way or another it seems like but we’ve never talked about it or connected it to help the healing process and help prevent it from happening again.”

In the three years since the walk began, Wyman said the community and schools have become more open about the subject of suicide and making it a topic that is safe to talk about. Proceeds from the walk go to fund speakers in local schools to talk about suicide awareness and prevention and other related topics.

“It’s out there still, it’s happening but I look at our immediate community and what we’re doing about it and that’s the positive that I’m focusing on,” Wyman said. “I can’t save the world, I can’t fix it all and you can’t control what happens in our community but I feel like we’ve taken everything that has happened and tried to push it forward positively.”

She has a message for those thinking about suicide: “Hold on, don’t give up. There are resources available, you just have to overcome your fear of telling someone and just do it and I guarantee once you tell someone, you’re going to feel so much better that it’s off your chest.”

She has a similar message to everyone: Watch for the warning signs and be observant. If someone begins to withdraw or goes through mood changes or something just seems off, ask the questions: “Are you feeling safe?” “Are you thinking of hurting yourself?” “Do you have any plans to commit suicide?”

“Just ask the direct questions and don’t beat around the bush,” she added.

Break the barrier, stop the silence and reach out.

If you want to be a part of the effort, Walk For H.O.P.E. is always looking for volunteers and ideas.

“I’ll raise the money but we all need to collaborate to push the movement,” said Wyman.

Information: walkforhopesandpoint.org or walkforhopesandpoint@gmail.com

Caroline Lobsinger can be reached by email at clobsinger@bonnercountydailybee.com and follow her on Twitter @CarolDailyBee.

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