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Youngster may teach us how to care for each other

Carol Shirk Knapp | Hagadone News Network | UPDATED 4 years, 10 months AGO
by Carol Shirk Knapp
| August 19, 2020 1:00 AM

He’s all of 9 years old. Been in foster care for six years — moved around too many times to count. Has a younger brother who got adopted last year — without him. I wonder what that felt like — to be left behind. We in families see our share of sibling rivalry — who’s the favorite? — but to be cut off from your only connection with family amid a sea of strangers? Must have been awfully lonely on that life raft.

Right now he’s in a group home. He’s put out a plea via the local news station in his Oklahoma City speak, “I hope one of y’all pick me.” Pretty risky when you’ve already been passed over. His three wishes are family, family, family. The biggest reason? “So I could have some people to talk to anytime I need to.”

Eager responses from around the country have poured in. All of a sudden thousands of people want to be Jordan’s family. I wonder if he knows. If it makes any difference. Probably not a whole lot until that right one lands. Until he’s actually there in his new home with “some people to talk to.”

Six years is two-thirds of his life. It doesn’t sound like he’s given up. Of course, he doesn’t come risk free. An agency spokesperson noted, “Many children have some form of special physical or behavioral health need, often because of the trauma they’ve endured. It’s no different for Jordan.” Is this why he wants to be a police officer — as he says, “Because they’re fun and they protect people.”

Currently there are more than 7,700 children in Oklahoma’s foster care system. About 500 waiting for adoption. Jordan’s got competition — “sibling rivalry” gone awry. Is there a needle-in-the-haystack match? I’d like to know how his story turns out.

What if he gets his family? Possibly he’ll move to a new locale. Or stay near and get to see his little brother sometimes. That family is willing. Maybe he’ll be an only and get to have his own room exactly as he wants. Or he could inherit a sister this time — maybe even a brother he gets to grow up with.

If he acts out — as all children do — and adults, too — maybe he’ll have someone to help him through. Someone who can navigate the waves — head into them with him — and steer him safely to shore.

He’s got big ideas about family. He’s using up his three wishes on them. Somehow I don’t think they’ll be wasted. Quite possibly this boy with no family is going to teach the rest of us how to care for ours.

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