Families find comfort, relief at Ronald McDonald House in Coeur d’Alene

About two months before baby boys Eli and Owen Calabretta were expected to join the world, they made an unannounced arrival.

"I felt like my water broke," mom Jesica Houlihan-Calabretta said Wednesday. "I was like, 'No way, it's too early.' I was only 32 weeks."

Not sensing an emergency, and certainly not expecting to give birth yet, Jesica, husband Kyle and their oldest child, John, 3, left their Pinehurst home for Kootenai Health in Coeur d'Alene.

"We stayed forever," Jesica said. "We did an emergency C-section because Owen's sac was torn and he was breech. I was dilated to six and he was ready to come out."

Everything moved quickly as they prepared Jesica to deliver her twins, who had not yet fully developed in the womb.

“They weren’t expecting them to be breathing when they came out and they prepared us for that,” she said. “But they both came out screaming. It was a huge relief.”

After Kyle cut the umbilical cords, the babies were taken to the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU) and Jesica was sent to recovery for four hours. It would be 17 hours before she would hold them against her skin for the first time.

“I finally got to not just see them, but hold them both at the same time,” she said. “It was quite emotional.”

Eli and Owen were going to be fine, but they were premature, underweight and needed help breathing since their little lungs had not developed that far. After three days it was clear the babies weren’t ready to go home.

That’s when Jesica’s stepmom discovered the Ronald McDonald House in the new Kootenai Health Hospitality Center. Rather than driving 40 minutes each way and being away from her newborns, Jesica was able to take up residence right next door to where the boys were being cared for.

“We went from the hospital straight to the Ronald McDonald House, and they were amazing,” she said. “We stayed there for a month and five days. Every time I walked through the door, I was greeted by name.”

The Ronald McDonald House is an 18,000-square-foot residential facility that is one side of the Kootenai Health Hospitality Center, sharing the building with the new Walden House. Both sides serve families whose loved ones are receiving extended care or making frequent trips to the hospital, but the Ronald McDonald House is specifically for families of babies whose visits are long and unexpected.

“When we were there, I was the only one in the Ronald McDonald side,” Jesica said. “I was like a princess. I had this huge whole house to myself. We didn’t have to fight for the stove or microwave. I could go get the cookies they made in my robe if I wanted.”

The Ronald McDonald House Charities of the Inland Northwest opened its Coeur d’Alene location in September. It serves families from across the region and into Montana. Since opening, 17 families have called it home.

“It’s a home away from home for the families of critically ill children,” said Corinne Weber, development coordinator for Ronald McDonald House Northern Idaho. “That’s our whole purpose, is to provide a haven for them. They can cook here, they can do their laundry here. We provide that sanctuary that’s close to the hospital so if they do get a call in the middle of the night, it’s only minutes away.”

The eight-bedroom facility at 2300 Ironwood Place is spacious and inviting, with a cozy living room, big laundry room, children’s indoor play area, large outdoor area and a sparkling, colorful commercial kitchen. Families who stay are provided items such as laundry soap and food staples so they don’t have to worry about grocery shopping during their stay.

“We have here what every home has. We’ve got TVs, we have videos for them to sit and relax, play spaces for the kids,” Weber said. “When families are here, they can pretend like they are at home.”

The Ronald McDonald House side is completely separate from the Walden House, although two “swing” rooms are shared in case one side is full. The Coeur d’Alene site is only one of two in the country that shares a facility with another care entity, but Ronald McDonald House manages both sides.

The $5.85 million project was all made possible by the collaboration of the Community Cancer Fund (a local organization dedicated to supporting cancer patients) and Ronald McDonald House with support from Kootenai Health.

“We’re very appreciative of the Community Cancer Fund’s facilitation of this unique collaboration,” said Mike Forness, executive director of the Ronald McDonald House Charities of the Inland Northwest. “It allows us to provide Ronald McDonald House services to families at Kootenai Health.”

Previously, the closest Ronald McDonald House was in Spokane, and the former Walden House just to the south of Kootenai Health was in an older, smaller building. The new building and collaboration between the organizations has allowed for the hospitality and facility to provide the most optimal services for patients and families.

“The families typically don’t know more than 24 hours in advance that they’re going to be delivering a baby,” Forness said. “It’s great to be able to do something that makes a difference for the families at Kootenai Health."

The most amazing part for families like Jesica and Kyle’s is that it’s completely free, supported by the Ronald McDonald nonprofit and generous donations from the community. Jesica said as she was filling out paperwork to stay, she was apprehensive about cost.

“They said ‘free’ and I literally started crying,” she said. “That was a huge burden lifted off our shoulders.”

Community members have a multitude of ways to get involved to help care for the families whose lives are flipped upside down. Volunteer chefs, bakers, housekeepers, hair stylists and more are all welcome to share their talents and time by visiting www.rmhcinlandnw.org and filling a volunteer slot. The Make-a-Meal program is a popular choice for families, businesses and churches who want to help. Normally, volunteers can go into the house and make meals, but Ronald McDonald House Charities has temporarily suspended visits because of coronavirus, so those who want to help can visit the website to make a donation for these families.

“It’s such a nice thing so when they come back from the hospital, at 4 or 5 (p.m.), there’s a meal for them,” Weber said. “It’s great for the people cooking the meal because they get to see and hear their story. And this is what I believe — any time the RMHC story becomes a family’s story, that’s when we have reached success. When we see ourselves in each other, we feel connected. When we feel connected as human beings, we want to help. That’s why RMHC is called 'The House That Love Built.'"