The world can be a very smelly place, and humans don’t always improve the situation. If anyone I happen to describe in the following story sounds familiar, keep in mind that the names have been changed to protect the odorous.
BONNERS FERRY HERALD | UPDATED 13 YEARS, 9 MONTHS AGO
So, it is Jan. 8 and I just finished building a wheelchair ramp for my dog. Not exactly a normal January, especially considering that there is no snow on the ground, but I have a more mobile wiener dog anyway. The ramp is an acquired taste at this point, but …
BONNERS FERRY HERALD | UPDATED 13 YEARS, 11 MONTHS AGO
There are few more horrifying terms in the world than "blind date." Strong bachelors turn pale at the thought, for their fate is no longer in their hands but in the control of at least one and often two or more other people.
BONNERS FERRY HERALD | UPDATED 14 YEARS, 1 MONTH AGO
Off and on I will be quoting supposed facts from so-called experts that in reality are just glorified census takers. You can believe every word I say if it pleases you, but don't be too surprised if somebody calls you a moron if they find out that you did so.
BONNERS FERRY HERALD | UPDATED 14 YEARS, 2 MONTHS AGO
Every week I struggle to find a subject to write about, hoping something will pop into my lap. This week, luckily for me, but maybe not for you, the world’s largest sperm bank quit taking donations from men with red hair.
BONNERS FERRY HERALD | UPDATED 14 YEARS, 2 MONTHS AGO
I have it on good authority that one of my caveman ancestors was the first human to look in a mirror. The mirror was a still, clear pond and his reaction was the same as mine is now; who’s that ape with the hairy ears?
BONNERS FERRY HERALD | UPDATED 14 YEARS, 3 MONTHS AGO
For years now I have been trimming my beard with a 1960’s-vintage electric clipper that sounds like a 500-pound mosquito and has so much torque it tries to jump out of my hand every time I crank it up. It makes up for having twice as much noise and vibration …
Humans are the great communicators of the universe. They communicate with words, with looks, with body language, with sign language and, when all else fails, with sigh language.
There is one sad, indisputable fact about every single one of us. Many will try to deny it, but their denials will be futile in the end. Sooner or later, most likely sooner, all doubt will be removed.
I can’t remember how old I was when I started taking my passion for reading behind the locked door of the family bathroom. Probably as soon as I learned to read, for it seemed like a waste of time to sit there doing nothing.
BONNERS FERRY HERALD | UPDATED 15 YEARS, 1 MONTH AGO